20 January 2006


Tuesday night I found out that my very first friend died in a car accident. Today the newspaper article is online with a picture that I didn't want to see. I feel like I should call my mom and tell her to not look at the webpage.

He's six months older than me, and even before I was born he was my friend- he'd lay on my mom's very pregnant belly and be completely content. Growing up, he was my protector, every picture we have, he has his arms around me, and my mom told me a really cute of story of him pushing another kid in retaliation for hurting me. At the time, his mom said she'd never been more proud of her little boy.

I've made through this week okay, but today's been rough. I couldn't fall asleep last night, and my brother started the day out by yelling at me, and then making rude comments when I fell apart and starting crying. It's just all too much, to top it off the funeral's next Tuesday- the first day of classes. And, it's 3000 miles away from here, which doesn't help.

My mom was talking about going to see his mom in a couple weeks, maybe around his twenty-first birthday- or else, maybe she'll get his mom to come here for a couple days, that'd be great for all of us I think.